“I am not a person who disappoints other people.”
Most of us see ourselves as responsible people, and our society reinforces this expectation.
Sometimes you may inadvertently disappoint someone by forgetting what they wanted. Or you might not have been able to fit what they wanted into today’s timeslot.
You may also delay even getting started on a task because you worry about it meeting the other person’s expectations. Or you stop in the middle of a task because you become distracted or keep mulling over whether you have done the task correctly so far.
Then you may not even be able to sleep at night. You are mulling over what you did or did not do.
These behaviors are common human occurrences. You may feel that you are not fulfilling a responsibility, and then you expect the other person to be disappointed in you.
Or you worry that what you did will be judged as not good enough.
How to Change Your Expectation of Needing to Please
Yes, you want to do a good job, but how someone reacts to what you did or didn’t do is not your responsibility. And you do not have to judge what you are doing even before you finish.
You are not superhuman, nor are you perfect. Sometimes someone will be disappointed with what you did or, even, with you. First, describe why you were unable to do what they expected. And then let it go. If the other person expresses their disappointment, you can acknowledge their feelings, but you do not have to apologize or take responsibility for them.
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